Pete and Repeat were in a boat.

I've already posted this recipe, but I feel the need to now show off my stellar photography skills and share the epiphany that was the version I made last night. Fasten your seatbelts—it's devil's food cake, another time.

So it doesn't look like much. Who cares? How many times have I had a pretty little bit of pastry or cake and it tastes, well, bad? This is not gorgeous, no, but it will make your tastebuds sing.

So what did I do differently?

• The fat. Butter, my friend. Butter.
• The cocoa powder. My go-to cocoa powder is the Dutch-process cocoa powder from Penzey's, but I haven't had the occasion to stop in the store or place a mail order recently, so this time I used Hershey's Special Dark. But here's the thing—I haven't liked the results of the Penzey's cocoa powder much. Hershey's Special Dark is a blend of Dutch-process and natural cocoa powders, and maybe therein lies the difference, as different types of cocoa have different levels of alkalinity. Whatever happened this time around, the chocolate flavor was richer than other attempts at the recipe.
• The flour. Because I'm a sucker for a low price-per-unit, I've been baking with Ultragrain flour from my beloved Costco. I've had pretty good results with it. The texture of the finished products can be crumbly, as with whole wheat, while at the same time becoming tough easily. It's a tricky flour to use, but it worked with this recipe.
• The sugar. Due to an unfortunate run-in with red wine vinegar, my white sugar met an untimely demise, so I used brown sugar.
• The icing. Since it's not likely that I have unsweetened chocolate and cream lying around my house, I threw some things together and ended up with the icing I wanted all along. It's pretty much a whipped ganache, but it is made of much less fancy ingredients than you'd expect.

Some might say I've created a whole new recipe. I say it's just an improvement. 

Beatrice's devil's food cake, improved

Cake: 

2 c. brown sugar

1/2 c. butter, softened

2 eggs

1/2 t. salt

1/2 c. milk

3 heaping T. cocoa

1 t. vanilla

1/2 t. baking powder

2 T. baking soda

3 c. flour

1 c. boiling water

Icing:

1 1/2 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips

3/4 c. half and half

1/2 c. brown sugar

3 T. butter

1/4 t. vanilla

1. Using a stand mixer, cream the brown sugar and butter. Add eggs, one at a time, mixing well after each addition. Add salt, milk, cocoa, vanilla, baking powder, and baking soda and mix to combine.
2. Mix in the flour at a low speed, one cup at a time. 
3. Gradually mix in the boiling water. Mix until smooth.
4. Pour into a prepared 9x13 pan (greased/floured or sprayed with nonstick spray). Bake at 350 degrees until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean, about 40 minutes. 
5. Meanwhile, make the icing. In a saucepan on medium heat, combine the chocolate chips, half and half, and brown sugar. Bring to a boil, and boil for four minutes. Remove from the heat and stir in butter and vanilla. In a stand mixer with a wire whip attachment, whip the icing until it is cool and begins to become fluffy and lighter in color. This should take at least 15 minutes.
6. Cool and spread icing on the top. 

My grandma's Amish cookies

My grandma was (well, is) the kind of grandma who had a jar (or, more accurately, a giant, green Tupperware container with a ridged lid) of cookies on her counter for hungry little hands to place into hungry little mouths. Her standards were chocolate chip cookies and these "Amish" cookies, which are flaky, tender sugar cookies. She would use a glass to press the cookies down, leaving a starburst shape on each.

But now, it's the end of an era. Really, the era's been gone for awhile, because my grandma hasn't been baking like she used to, but now it seems the door is officially closed. My grandma has moved out of her house, which has now been sold, and her stuff has moved out as well. My mom hauled a bag of goods to my house, and this bag included two cookie stamps—one of a bunch of tulips and another of the sort of owl that was retro before it was cool. In retrospect, I wish I would've told my mom I wanted one of those glasses. The cookie stamps are nice, and since there are two of them, my older kids could do the stamping without any arguments, but they just aren't the same.

Since I'm a sucker for old-fashioned recipes, I'll reproduce it as she wrote down on a recipe card long ago. The "double it and share" suggestion always gives me a chuckle. I did exactly that the first time I made the cookies, and it was certainly a batch that was worthy of that underlined "a lot."

I did not have margarine in the house, so I used butter. They would be better with margarine, since it lends a lightness. Shortening might do this, as well, but might not have the right flavor. (But, go ahead, use butter-flavored Crisco. I won't judge.) I baked these at 350 degrees until they just barely started to brown at the edges.

My Grandma's Amish Cookies

Beat 2 eggs and set aside.
Beat 1 c. oil and 1 c. margarine, 1 c. powdered sugar, 1 c. white sugar, 1 tsp. salt, 1 tsp. vanilla, 1 tsp. soda, 1/2 tsp. cream of tartar. Add eggs and 4 1/2 c flour. Cool. Roll into balls and press with cookie stamp or sugared glass. Makes a nice sized batch. Double it and share. It makes a lot.

Carrot cake from someone who knows carrot cake

I make the best carrot cake ever, no lie. It's even almost healthy, if you pretend that frosting has no calories. I looked long and hard for a carrot cake recipe that met my basic requirements: it must not have pineapple or raisins; it must use oil; it must not contain egg substitutes or anything else to make it "light," since I have my own ideas about that stuff. The result is this recipe, adapted from something I found on Recipe Source and can't find again because there are approximately 500 carrot cake recipes.

My modifications are to use some whole wheat flour, substitute applesauce for half the oil, and substitute flax seed meal and water for two of the eggs. This makes three layers, one 13x9 pan, or 24 cupcakes. I'll bet you could make a good zucchini cake if you use that instead of the carrots. I leave out the nuts these days, since I have a little dude who isn't quite at the nut-eating stage yet.

The 501st recipe for carrot cake on the Internet
Cake:
2 c. flour (I use half whole wheat and half white)
2 c. sugar
2 t. baking soda
1 t. salt
2 t. cinnamon
1 t. ginger
1/2 t. allspice
2 eggs
2 T. flax seed meal
6 T. water
1 t. vanilla
3/4 c. applesauce
3/4 c. oil
3 c. grated carrots
1/2 c. chopped walnuts or pecans (optional)

Frosting:
8 oz. cream cheese, softened
1/2 c. butter, softened
1 t. vanilla
4 c. powdered sugar

1. Combine flour, baking soda, salt, and spices. Set aside. 
2. Mix sugar, eggs, flax seed meal, water, vanilla, applesauce, and oil. 
3. Gently mix wet ingredients into dry ingredients. 
4. Fold in carrots. 
5. Bake in a 350 degree oven in a greased 13x9 pan for about 40 minutes (timing will obviously vary if you use a different sort of format), or until a toothpick comes out clean in the center. Cool completely.
6. For frosting, beat together the cream cheese, butter, and vanilla. Add powdered sugar and beat until fluffy. Frost cake and enjoy!

"Use your imagination" muffins

First, imagine a picture of really delicious muffins here.

Second, imagine these muffins brimming with any sort of fruit, nut, berry, or other goodie possible. The sky is the limit. This is a recipe you can experiment with and the results will be delicious despite your lack of adherence to a specific recipe. This is how I like to cook, using recipes as a guide instead of gospel.

I also will not micromanage your baking. The original recipe is very specific about whisking dry ingredients together, adding things in a specific way. You can do that if you want. Me? I dump things in a bowl and as long as I don't mix the flour very long, they turn out.

Use your imagination muffins
Adapted from Elise's blueberry muffin recipe. Makes big, bakery-style 12-16 muffins, but cooked in a regular tin. The thick "liquid" used to bind everything together - yogurt, sour cream, or buttermilk - enables you to really mound the batter up and get a big, puffy muffin. These are fantastic straight out of the oven.

Ingredients
3 cups of all-purpose flour
1 Tbsp baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt (1/2 teaspoon if using unsalted butter)
1 stick butter, softened
1 cup sugar
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla or almond extract
1 1/2 cup plain yogurt, sour cream, or buttermilk
Plus: mix-ins of your choice (see sample variations)

Method

1. Preheat oven to 375°F.
2. Oil or grease a standard muffin tin. You will need 12 to 16 spots, and will definitely want to use a tin rather than any stand-alone reusable muffin papers, as these spread a little on the top.
3. In a large mixing bowl, cream butter and sugar together until fluffy. Add eggs one at a time, beating until incorporated after each one. Add vanilla/almond extract.
4. Add baking powder, baking soda, and salt, and mix to combine.
5. Mix in yogurt/sour cream/buttermilk.
6. Gently fold in flour. (Or, throw caution to the wind and dump it in your mixer, furiously beat it just until it comes together, and hope it doesn't become tough.)
7. Fold in whatever mix-ins you're using.
8. Mound the batter into each tin, going for about an inch over the top of the pan.
9. Bake until muffins are golden brown, about 25 to 30 minutes.  

 Variations

• 1 1/2 cup blueberries (fresh or frozen) and 1/2 t. lemon zest
• 1 1/2 cup blueberries (fresh or frozen) with almond extract
• 2 cups diced apples mixed with 1/4 cup of the sugar, 1 teaspoon of cinnamon and any other sweet spices you like (I use allspice), and a pinch of salt and left to sit while the remaining ingredients are mixed
• 1 1/2 cup cranberries (fresh or frozen), 1/2 cup chopped pecans or walnuts, and orange zest if you have it
• 1 cup chocolate chips
• 1 1/2 cup chopped strawberries or whole raspberries
• Whatever your little heart desires

Nothing says "happy birthday" like pastries.

If there's any time to make and consume butter-laden pastry without guilt, it's your birthday. Today is mine, so I started some dough last night and crafted some danish this morning. I've been looking for an excuse to do this for some time, and the fire burned even hotter once I put up that awesome apricot jam.


This is my first time with danish pastry dough. The recipe didn't intimidate me in the least, but it probably should have once I started rolling things out and things started not going well at all. The butter softened very quickly, despite the temperature last night being lower than it had been in a couple of weeks. I sort of half-assed the rolling-out and only got it rolled an inch thick before I had to give up and stick it back in the fridge two out of the three times.

This morning went a bit better. The dough had been refrigerated overnight and I was able to roll it out and get the round pastries done before things got too soft. I simply cut 1/2 inch strips, twirled them, and made a coil. (Tip: A smaller thickness of dough in the center will make them easier to fill.) I ended up with thirteen of those and four square pastries filled with cream cheese (cream cheese + a bit of sugar, lemon juice, and vanilla) AND apricot.

I'm pleased at how flaky the pastries were, even with my half-assed rolling. The filling's delicious as well, and I opted to leave off any sort of icing or sugar, as they're delicious enough on their own.

Happy birthday to my mouth!

Challah, holla.

My first attempt at challah - which, interestingly, I made before deciding it was definitely time to get all Jewish - was just awesome. Maybe this, more than anything, proves that I was Jewish in a past life.

This does not mean I can correctly pronounce it, nor did braiding come naturally. I have YouTube to thank for its traditional challah shape.



"My Challah Recipe" made a delightful loaf of bread, but next time I will try a recipe with sugar instead of honey so my little honeybee can eat it, as he isn't quite old enough for delicious botulism spores.

And I'll tell you something: French toast made with leftover challah tastes like donuts.

My cinnamon rolls that aren't famous yet but should be.

I have long been on a quest for the perfect cinnamon roll recipe. This was an arduous task, involving lots of butter, cinnamon, and new, larger pants. My perseverance has paid off, and it's a good thing I only wear dresses now, as they're a little more forgiving of gaining a billion pounds because you found the most seriously amazing cinnamon roll recipe ever and wish to eat a panful every day.

This recipe is adapted from one called Clone of a Cinnabon, but let me tell you - this is better than a Cinnabon. Your mind will be blown.

For those of you who, for some reason, don't like your cinnamon rolls topped with sweet, luscious cream cheese icing, there's a caramel-pecan roll option.

...and more baking

I made more bread today, since we were having company and beef stew, and that necessitates bread. Brilliant me forgot the salt until mid-knead, but sprinkling in between kneads appeared to have been sufficient to prevent disaster. It's not as good as the last batch, but definitely edible.

And then I made cake!

DEVILS FOOD CAKE

2 C. WHITE OR BROWN SUGAR, 1/2 C. SHORTENING, 2 EGGS, A PINCH OF SALT, 1/2 C. SWEET MILK, 3 HEAPING TBSP. COCOA, 1 TSP VANILLA, 1/2 TSP. BAKING PWD., 2 TSP. SODA, 1 C. BOILING WATER. CREAM SUGAR, SALT AND SHORTENING. ADD EGGS AND MIX WELL. THEN ADD MILK. SIFT FLOUR, BAKING PWD., COCOA AND SODA TOGETHER. ADD VANILLA AND THEN THE BOILING WATER LAST. BAKE IN MOD. OVEN (350 DEG.)

ICING FOR DEVILS FOOD

1 BAR GERMAN'S SWEET CHOCOLATE, 1/2 C. SUGAR, 1/2 C. CREAM, 1 HEAPING TABLESPOON BUTTER, 1 TSP. VANILLA. BOIL THE CHOCOLATE, SUGAR AND CREAM FOR 4 OR 5 MINUTES. ADD TE BUTTER AND VANILLA AND BEAT WELL.

BEATRICE MOHAM

This recipe is from the old church cookbook, as we call it. It's from the mid-1950s and everything is set in uppercase, with signatures of the women who wrote the recipes - all in the same hand. There are advertisements in the back, too: "Compliments Of TIME THEATER Douglas Ingalls Phone 88-R11 Pepin Wisconsin." My grandma added notes, certain recipes have a box drawn around them (like the cake above), and some recipes from newspapers are pasted on the blank pages. My husband complains about the way I write recipes, but I write them just like these church ladies did, with estimates and shorthand and vagueness.

You'll notice (or will you?) another charming quirk: a total lack of proofreading. There's no amount listed for the flour in the recipe. 2 1/2 cups appears to be the correct amount. And you can substitute some whole milk (or maybe even non-whole milk) for the cream and it'll still work. I substituted three tablespoons of cocoa plus another tablespoon each of butter and sugar for the bar of chocolate (which I am taking to mean a one-ounce bar of chocolate), too. The icing will thicken as it cools, but no one'll kick you out of the house if you feed them this cake with drippy icing. It's still delicious.

A day for baking

It's day two of a four-day weekend and rain's been falling all day, so it was the perfect time for baking.

I started out making pizza dough, which turned into homemade deep-dish pizza for dinner. It turned out satisfactorily. The tomatoes I used (Red Gold brand) weren't as rich-tasting as I had hoped, parts of the crust were tough because I really had to manhandle it, and the sausage was subpar because I was using what the grocery store had to offer, but it's certainly edible, if not really photogenic.

Then it was onto English muffins, using half wheat and half white flour, and by golly, they taste like English muffins, if a bit denser than storebought. I followed that up by making waffles with a topping of bananas, brown sugar, maple syrup, and butter, plus some pecans on the grownups' (not pictured). Then I made bread dough, and oatmeal-chocolate chip cookies.

The bread turned out to be, possibly, my best ever. I credit being more patient and more distracted than usual. Here's the recipe, for posterity:

Whole wheat bread
(modified from the Dakota Maid whole wheat bread recipe)

4 cups whole wheat flour
2-1/2 cups bread flour
2 pkg. dry yeast
1 1/2 cups warm milk
1 1/4 cups warm water
1/4 cup honey
1/4 cup oil
1 T salt

Dissolve yeast milk and water. Add honey, oil, and salt. Beat in 1 cup whole-wheat flour. Add remaining wheat flour.

Turn out on counter and knead, adding enough all-purpose flour to make a soft dough. Place in lightly greased bowl and let rise in warm place until doubled in bulk (about 45 min). Punch down dough, divide and form into two balls. Cover and let rest about 5 min. Roll each ball on lightly flour-dusted surface into a 10x6 in. rectangle. Roll up jellyroll fashion and pinch ends together. Place in two lightly greased 81/2 x 41/2 in or 9x5 in loaf pans, with seam sides down. Cover and let rise until doubled in bulk.

Bake at 400 degrees F for 40 min or until bread sounds hollow when tapped. Remove from pans immediately. Cool on wire rack.

Yield: 2 loaves

I think we're covered on the carb front for awhile.